By: Curtis Evelo | December 26, 2022
This article is a bit of a different type than what I would normally write but I feel it is important to discuss. To start, I want everyone who reads this article to take a moment and pray for absolutely everyone involved in the foster care system. From the social workers to the parents to the police and healthcare department, to the families that are involved.
Real Life Case Study
Everyone needs prayer in this. What I’m about to show is a text that I received from my wife as we were taking care of a newborn baby that was born addicted to many illegal drugs. The care was being monitored in the NICU in the hospital. This topic is sensitive and if by chance anyone reading this is or has been affected by foster care, I mean absolutely no ill intent. I just want to reveal a side that most never see, and I want to do this with the most pastoral care I can.
Original text (modified to remove identifying markers)
“This is the hardest, saddest thing I have ever seen!! It could be a long few days until they let this newborn go. This baby is MISERABLE!! They have to give it morphine to help with the symptoms. The baby shakes uncontrollably and gets as stiff as a board and screams!! Its eyes vibrate back and forth, and it can’t focus on anything. This newborn has to be held through all of it. They asked if I could stay through the night… I told them I needed to go home and get some things handled tonight and, in the morning, and I’d be back tomorrow. I think they expect me to stay after That tho…?? This one took a turn for the worse this afternoon, so that’s why they didn’t tell me all of this when they called. This newborn was moved from the other hospital to here last night for the extra care it needs. I’ve never heard a baby cry like this before!”
What led to this text was My wife received a call from the hospital and the social worker to take this little one into our home after being left at the NICU for two days. So, my wife and oldest daughter dropped everything and drove a 40-mile trip to go care for this newborn and get to know the symptoms and the care needed.
There are so many instances where care families and workers are caught in the middle of something that truly is a tragic issue. And our hearts hurt deeply for the children and for the circumstances they are thrust into by no will of their own.
My plea to all is to understand there are many different facets to the issues leading up to the need for foster families to be called or to be “on Call” and I’m not going to be able to cover them all in this. But what I will attempt to pin down is some key aspects that can be done on the front side and back side of these issues.
Appeal for Biblical-Based Men’s Ministries
Let’s start with asking pastors to lead good and healthy biblical-based men’s ministry, raising up men that feel needed and to be part of something bigger than themselves. Men that are given purpose and connection to a larger group of men; to lift up and call the bluff when needed. Most men’s ministry is focused on a one-time or a couple- of- times a year event(s). The follow-up after those events is moderate at best and most of the time poor. By taking time with the men, you build the children up to be confident in where they belong. For boys watching a father be loving and caring to his mother but still be courageous to defend her when needed is huge in establishing the core of what God designed them to be.
For example the first time a boy should hear “your strong and courageous” should be from dad and so in this, the dad is building a “rite of passage “ so to speak. This “rite of passage” is a passage from boyhood into manhood and is something missing in our culture today and if not done it leaves the boy to flounder and seek affirmation from the wrong source. For little girls to have a father that is tough and tender at the appropriate times is massively important in building security in them, knowing they actually can achieve the goals in their own lives. The first time any girl hears the words “I love you and your beautiful “is from their dad and not from some boy that is trying to woo her.
Appeal for Biblical-Based Family Groups
Next, let’s start developing biblical-based young family groups that seek others of that same age to build support and help when needed and have the ability to speak into situations that arise.
Appeal for Long-term Ministry Groups
Next would be to realize that this is a mission field, and set up long-term mission-minded ministry groups to serve the people that are in these situations that are suffering from addiction, abuse, loneliness, etc along with the children. It’s so impactful for children to get a chance for the first time to know they are secure and have someone’s ear to hear them. This mission field that is in our own communities is ripe for harvest. Jesus said, “Do you not say, “There are yet four months, then comes the harvest? Look … and see that the fields are white for harvest” (John 4:35 ESV). And our communities are in desperate need to hear and see the Gospel worked out. I truly believe that we have a tremendous opportunity for spreading the Gospel to those unreached and will see a change if we get involved.
Appeal for Ministries to Immediate Care Facilities
Next, build a ministry to assist the immediate care facilities such as in social services, foster families, and even temporary foster homes by getting diapers, wipes, clothes, shoes, toiletries, etc. develop a relationship with those entities so that they can relay the needs. We have had children who showed up at our door at 2 am with little to nothing on other than an adult oversized t-shirt to cover them. The need is so great that I feel we have a tremendous opportunity to live out what James told us. James writes, “Religion that is pure and undefiled before God the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself in stained from the world” (James 1:27 ESV).
Building a ministry that can help gird up and sustain the high needs of the back end of this crisis can only be confident and successful if the front end is developing good and supportive and strong families where people have a purpose moving in one direction bringing glory to God and executing the Great Commission.
About the Author
Curtis Evelo is a cattle rancher at the E6 Hereford Ranch in St. Ignatius, Montana. Curtis is the Co-Host and Producer of the Bellator Christi Podcast. He often teaches and speaks at his church Cornerstone Faith Center in St. Ignatius. Curtis provides a common-sense approach to Christianity as he contemplates the wonders of God’s creation in Big Sky Country. Curtis serves as the Vice-President of Bellator Christi Ministries, a contributor, and the co-host of the Bellator Christi Podcast. His research interests include Jewish studies in the New Testament, Old Testament typologies, and studies on free will.
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